{"id":1001,"date":"2011-12-22T01:58:53","date_gmt":"2011-12-22T06:58:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/?p=1001"},"modified":"2011-12-11T11:20:44","modified_gmt":"2011-12-11T16:20:44","slug":"listening-to-unwelcome-messages","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/2011\/12\/listening-to-unwelcome-messages\/","title":{"rendered":"Listening to Unwelcome Messages"},"content":{"rendered":"

by Dwayne Phillips<\/p>\n

\nSometimes events don’t occur as I planned. They do, however, lead to what I want. To discover the result, I have to listen to unwelcome messages.<\/b><\/p>\n

I often receive unwelcome messages. I plan something; I invite people who I believe will benefit from the something, and none of them come.<\/p>\n

There are several possible reactions from me:<\/p>\n

  • What is wrong with those ungrateful people?\n
  • Those people are just too stupid to understand that this is good for them.\n
  • I’ll send out the invitations earlier next time.\n
  • I’ll show them. I won’t ever invite them to anything again.\n
  • What can I learn from this?\n

    The last item I listed is the most beneficial. Consider what has happened: (1) I sent a message to other people and (2) they reacted. There is at least one message in their reaction. <\/p>\n

    Now I have a choice; will I listen to their reaction?
    \nSometimes this isn’t much fun. At times it is much more fun to be angry at these ungrateful people. That reaction, however, doesn’t provide much learning.<\/p>\n

    That is part of the problem of listening to these unwelcome messages. I have to put away the “fun” aspects of anger and self-righteousness, at least for a while. Instead, I have to step away from the situation for a moment and think. I examine the reaction, consider alternative messages, sometimes I even ask someone why the didn’t come.<\/p>\n

    I may even go back to my original intent. What did I want to happen after the event I created? Has that goal occurred even without my event? That is usually the answer. People didn’t attend because they have reached the place I want them to be. They didn’t need my event.<\/p>\n

    Alas, sometimes things don’t work as I planned, but instead, they worked as I had hoped. I just have to breathe calmly for a while before I realize the outcome.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    by Dwayne Phillips Sometimes events don’t occur as I planned. They do, however, lead to what I want. To discover the result, I have to listen to unwelcome messages. I often receive unwelcome messages. I plan something; I invite people who I believe will benefit from the something, and none of them come. There are […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[32],"tags":[154],"class_list":["post-1001","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-communication","tag-communication"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1001","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1001"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1001\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1003,"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1001\/revisions\/1003"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1001"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1001"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1001"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}