{"id":2795,"date":"2018-12-20T01:27:51","date_gmt":"2018-12-20T06:27:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/?p=2795"},"modified":"2018-12-01T08:38:36","modified_gmt":"2018-12-01T13:38:36","slug":"i-hate-it-when-someone-is-looking-over-my-shoulder","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/2018\/12\/i-hate-it-when-someone-is-looking-over-my-shoulder\/","title":{"rendered":"I Hate It When Someone is Looking Over My Shoulder"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>by Dwayne Phillips<\/p>\n<p><strong>It isn&#8217;t easy to admit that I lack knowledge for something that &#8220;I should know.&#8221; Most people are like me in this respect. How can I &#8220;help&#8221; without looking over their shoulder?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Maybe if you did it that way instead of this way,&#8221; said the eager, wanting-to-be-helpful person standing behind me and looking over my shoulder.<\/p>\n<p>Why can&#8217;t these people simply go away. Don&#8217;t they know that I don&#8217;t want them standing behind me, looking over my shoulder, and telling me how the world should be?<\/p>\n<p>The situation is completely different, however, when I am trying to &#8220;help&#8221; someone else do whatever it is they are doing. They simply don&#8217;t have the benefit of my experience and I am happy to share and all things will be better in the world when they listen to me and &#8230;<\/p>\n<p>and I am looking over their shoulder and I don&#8217;t understand it when they react the same way I react<\/p>\n<p>Yet, there is a point when we all need someone to show us a better way. How can we do that without looking over their shoulder.<\/p>\n<p>Some things to avoid saying:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Let me HELP you<\/li>\n<li>Why are you doing that?<\/li>\n<li>I know how to do this (it&#8217;s obvious you don&#8217;t)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Some things that are a little more acceptable:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>I was stuck on this a few days ago, it was frustrating<\/li>\n<li>I never understood this and I still don&#8217;t really understand it now, but I saw something that worked<\/li>\n<li>I hate it when that happens, too.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Shift from YOU (you&#8217;re obviously wrong and you obviously need HELP)<\/p>\n<p>to<\/p>\n<p>I (I don&#8217;t know it all, I stumbled lots of times, I was blessed to find something that worked better for me).<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>by Dwayne Phillips It isn&#8217;t easy to admit that I lack knowledge for something that &#8220;I should know.&#8221; Most people are like me in this respect. How can I &#8220;help&#8221; without looking over their shoulder? &#8220;Maybe if you did it that way instead of this way,&#8221; said the eager, wanting-to-be-helpful person standing behind me and [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[32,105,107,302,312],"tags":[154,219,221,303,313],"class_list":["post-2795","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-communication","category-competence","category-consulting","category-help","category-humility","tag-communication","tag-competence","tag-consulting","tag-help","tag-humility"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2795","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2795"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2795\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2796,"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2795\/revisions\/2796"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2795"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2795"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dwaynephillips.net\/workingup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2795"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}