Working Up

by Dwayne Phillips

I have always been driven by setting and achieving goals – big goals. Recently, however, I have learned the value of setting a minimum expectation for any endeavor. That minimum removes much of the stress that I have imposed on myself for much of my life.

Back in December, we were attempting to drive from our home in Northern Virginia to Louisiana to visit family for the holidays. We drove into a snowstorm and spent a night parked in a gas station next to the Interstate (for more on that adventure, see here). It wasn’t much fun, but we were fine.

The surprise for me was that I  wasn’t upset. I would normally be fuming every minute of the wait. Think of all the time we were wasting! A couple of months of perspective has helped me to learn why I wasn’t upset:

I had a minimum expectation for the trip, and we were beating that.

We left home on a Friday. We absolutely had to be at the New Orleans airport the next Tuesday morning to meet someone. That was the minimal expectation. If we arrived in Louisiana any time before Tuesday, we would be fine. We arrived in Louisiana at 1:30 AM Sunday, beating the minimum by more than 48  hours. All was fine.

Some thought, and this concept of the minimum expectation can be applied to most endeavors. Some examples:

1. I start writing a book, minimum expectation of sales is zero.
2. I look for a new job, minimum expectation is no job.
3. I send someone an email, minimum expectation is no reply.
4. I start any new endeavor, minimum expectation is that I learn at least one thing.

Consider example 1. When I start writing a book, the effort is a success if I finish writing the book. Any sales are a bonus. Upon further consideration, if I write one chapter or one page or one sentence, that is a success in that I have written more than if I never started.

That leads me to example 4. I can consider any endeavor a success as long as I learn at least one thing. All else is extra – a bonus.

Setting minimum expectations is hard for some of us – especially me. I have always accomplished much in my life. Setting big goals and reaching them is a way a life.  Retreating from that is…well it is not good. Perhaps, however, I have learned a few things along the way that help me to accept minimum expectations.

The odd thing about accepting a lesser goal is that life is easier. I sleep better; I am happier, and people around me don’t have to put up with an obsessed person.

Another thing about minimum expectations – they affect decisions. The minimum expectation was to reach Louisiana by Tuesday morning. Any accident would mean not reaching that expectation. We decided to stop and wait and wait and wait. Moving forward into the snow in the dark would have incurred unnecessary risk. That was a good decision.