Working Up

by Dwayne Phillips

Some people don’t know what they want until they see it. This can be agonizing for those of us who decide what we want and then do it. There is a way for the two of us to work together.

The conversation usually proceeds like this:

• Me: You tell me what you want, and I will write it.
• Other: Great! Write this.
• Me: I write this, I bring it back to the other person.
• Other: Hmmmm, write something else.
• Repeat a few dozen times.

I find at least two possibilities here (we’ll only cover two today).

(1) This is the “bring me a rock” game.

Bring me a rock proceeds something like this:

• Other: Bring me a rock.
• Me: Run outside, pick up a rock, bring it back.
• Other: Not that one.
• Repeat a few hundred times.

Bring me a rock is a complete waste of time. If this is the case, quit. Go somewhere else and do something of value.

(2) Maybe the other person doesn’t yet know what he wants.

The other person is trying to discover what he wants. He is proceeding sincerely and with all good intentions. The concept, however, has yet to form in his mind.

When viewed quickly from the outside, these two situations look the same. That is the frustrating part. It all looks like a silly game, and if you are the person writing pieces that seem like fetching rocks, you just want to quit.

A piece of advice: ask.

Ask if this is situation (1) or situation (2). Most of the time, it is situation (2) and the other person has never heard of situation (1) let alone imagined that they were playing bring me a rock.

There are less time-consuming activities that can help a person see what they want. Sketches on white boards, outlines, and conversations are a few. Regardless of the technique employed, once the other person realizes that situation (1) and (2) exist and  you realize that the other person is proceeding sincerely and with all good intentions, things tend to work well.