Working Up

by Dwayne Phillips

Since I am skinny, and no one yells at me about what I write here, I will write some more about weight loss.

Now to a more specific diet. This is taken in part from the movie Fat Head. Henceforth, when you see Burger King you may substitute McDonald’s or Wendy’s or something else. When you see Whopper you may substitute Quarter Pounder or Single or something else.

Here is a diet that almost guarantees weight loss.

• Breakfast: a Whopper and a no-calorie drink
• Lunch: a Whopper and a no-calorie drink
• Dinner: a Whopper and a no-calorie drink

A no-calorie drink, in order of preference, is:

• water
• unsweetened tea
• coffee
• diet soda

As best as I can determine, the Whopper has 630 calories, so the above diet provides 1,890 calories a day. The average American, by the way where is that person, consumes much more than that daily. I think most of us would lose weight eating 1,890 calories a day.

Balanced diet?

I know the reply to this diet as I have heard it many times:

but this isn’t a balanced diet

Okay, you live in an air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned vehicle, probably work in an air-conditioned workplace, drink clean water, use indoor toilets, bath every day, wear clean clothes, sleep in a bed every night, and so on and so on with the health benefits of modern life.

The preponderance of these modern life benefits far outweigh the concerns of a balanced diet. At least for the six months that you will use this diet to lose weight.

Okay, now everyone can be angry with me, but only for an hour. After all, I am “skinny” and the average American is not.