Working Up

by Dwayne Phillips

Since I am “skinny,” I feel obligated to tell the world how to lose weight.

About 15 years ago I discovered that I was skinny. I never knew that. As a child I was always “small for my age” and you many not know how much a boy hates to be called “small for his age” and that ranks just above “he looks like his mother.”

Anyways, I graduated high school at 5′ 8″ but grew two inches in college. I always thought I was an average weight for my height. Surprise – I was and still am skinny.

Since I am skinny in a nation of obese people, I want to share my secrets of weight loss and weight control. Here there are:

1. eat less
2. walk more

Some caveats:

1. when eating less, continue physical activity as before
2. when walking more, don’t eat any more

Now lets delve into more science or nutrition or experience – also guaranteed to make people angry with me.

Don’t eat

• bread
• potatoes
• fruit

Also, don’t drink calories such as

• coke, pepsi, and the like
• sweetened tea
• fruit juice

Those foods have a lot of sugar (not technically correct, but that is the general idea). I told you people would be angry with me.

But then again, I am skinny and you are probably not because, as I keep reading, most Americans are overweight to really, really, really overweight. Ignore the above at your peril. Be angry with me all you want, but for no more than an hour. I really am a nice person.