Working Up

by Dwayne Phillips

People used to use the phrase “reverse psychology” more than they do now. I suppose I act out reverse psychology a lot these days. I don’t, however, of it in those terms. I think of my actions in vastly different terms.

People used to say the phrase that sits atop this post. If you wanted someone to do X, tell them to do Y, and they will do X because they just want to goad you.

Somehow, I still use reverse psychology, but it isn’t the same. For example, I want someone to feel comfortable with me, to spend time with me. When they tell me they are going away for a while, I tell them, “Great. That sounds like a good thing to do. I hope you enjoy it.” They go away, enjoy themselves, and come back and spend more time with me.

Reverse psychology?

How about describing it this way: I want the best for them. I want them to enjoy their choices. They appreciate that and show their appreciation.

Reverse psychology?

I don’t think so. I think it is simply a gesture of good will and best wishes. Things seem to work for the best when I live that way – wanting the best for the other person.

Reverse psychology?

Maybe, but probably not.