Working Up

by Dwayne Phillips

Let’s review some basics on telling another person about something they do and did that affects me and us.

The basis of this post comes from consultant and writer Esther Derby. Over the years, we’ve discussed this topic, and I have learned much. I hope to pass along some of Esther’s thoughts. We can do better; I certainly can do better.

The out of providing feedback to another person is:

• Create an opening
• Describe the behavior or events
• State the impact
• Make a request

I want to talk with you about something.

Last week’s meeting, last month’s PowerPoint, yesterday’s lunch…

Did you notice how John left in the middle of everything? John is important to this project, yet he was so angry that he left. Without John’s support, this won’t work. Let’s try to make it work.

In the future, let’s meet before the meeting and discuss how John might receive what we are trying to convey.

This isn’t difficult. This isn’t easy; at times it is the most difficult task in the world. Still, it seems to work better than the other things I have done on many disastrous occasions. Let’s all do better—especially me.