by Dwayne Phillips We tend to treasure failed tools. It is as if the tool becomes part of me. One remedy is to realize that a tool I use is just that, a tool I use. It is not me. I don’t know how many times I have seen it. A person is standing at […]
The Depleted Dry-Erase Marker
February 23rd, 2012 · No Comments
We All Want Cake (so give everyone cake)
February 6th, 2012 · No Comments
by Dwayne Phillips We seem to believe that special things are for special people. And we all want to be a special person. We can employ this idea to surround ourselves with special people. A few years ago I was at a high school track meet. There was this little girl at the concession stand. […]
Sources of Fear
February 2nd, 2012 · No Comments
by Dwayne Phillips We are afraid of some things. Often, however, the heart of the fear is not the stated fear. Finding the source of fear can help us cope with it. Am I afraid of heights? No, but I am afraid of falling off a tall building. Many of us have fears. There is […]
Tags: Culture · Fear · Writing
The Rich-Poor Travel Gap
January 23rd, 2012 · No Comments
by Dwayne Phillips The rich-poor gap widens in the area of travel. Seeing other places and other people is a big experience that the rich enjoy and the poor lack. I live in Fairfax County, Virginia. This is one of the richest counties in America. I noticed recently that the kids in high school and […]
Information Flow: A Problem with TV News
January 5th, 2012 · No Comments
by Dwayne Phillips I finally realize why I can’t watch the news on television: the information flow is relatively slow. I haven’t watched news on television in years. I stay abreast of the issues of the day via reading from the Internet. I scan probably a dozen major news sites as well as about a […]
Tags: Communication · Culture
My Hated Yellow Shirt
December 26th, 2011 · No Comments
by Dwayne Phillips Often, a seemingly illogical action has logic when something else is in play. One way to learn of what else is in play is to ask. I have a yellow shirt. Someone gave this to me a few years ago. I hate the yellow shirt because I think the color is awful. […]
Reality Applies to Us, Too
October 27th, 2011 · No Comments
by Dwayne Phillips As much as we might wish otherwise, reality applies to us, too. I was recently speaking with a group of people age 13 to 60. My question was: How far back can you remember? The near-unanimous answer was, “age three.” Some people could vaguely remember some things that happened when they were […]
Tags: Culture · Judgment · Logic · Magic
Inflicting Advice
June 23rd, 2011 · No Comments
by Dwayne Phillips Advice is welcome and often heeded in one circumstance: when it is requested. Freely giving advice to the non-requesting tends only to waste energy, time, and emotions. Consultant, author, and friend Jerry Weinberg has written (something like) Most people interpret attempts help as attempts to interfere. This is true for 98.6% of […]
Tags: Communication · Culture · Expectations · People
Identity Rules
June 6th, 2011 · No Comments
by Dwayne Phillips An identity rule is something that I must have or must do or must be to maintain my identity. If you violate an identity rules, you lose your identity. People have rules, I know I have my own rules. Have you ever tied the shoe laces of another adult? That would be […]
Tags: Culture · Differences · Expectations · General Systems Thinking · People
Change the World – 0.04 – Smile
May 5th, 2011 · No Comments
by Dwayne Phillips When you call me that, smile from “The Virginian: a horseman of the plains” by Owen Wister The statement above is one of the most misquoted from American literature, movie folklore, and culture. The misquote is: smile when you say that The implication is simple, if you are smiling, you can say […]