Working Up

by Dwayne Phillips

We have invented a new job: it is the chatic (pronounced like “static”) or the chattering bot technician.

I often work as a chattering bot technician. Substitute the name of your favorite system (ChatGPT, Claude, Gemini, Coilot, Mistral, Qwen, Grok, etc.) for chattering bot and you have it. We employ “ChatGPT technicians” and “Claude technicuans.”

I use one of these chattering bot at least half the day to manipulate information. Information in, information out in a different format that people want. Is it programming? Is it engineering? I don’t know. It is somewhat technical and reduced from art to a science of sorts.

I think that makes me a technician: a worker who has special skills and training in a practical, technical, or scientific field. Their main job is to install, test, fix, or run machines and equipment. (from Wikipedia)

I run the chattering bot.

Okay, “chattering bot technician” takes too long to say and type. Let’s shorten it to “chat tech.” That is two words and two syllables. Well, you know how we like to mumble and slur things together. After five minutes and five utterances, we have one word of two syllables or “chattech.” Well, let’s slur that together to make it even faster to mumble.

Before you know it, we are spewing out “chatic” in the same rhythm and emphasis that we say the word “static.”

Now the boss says, “Meet Dwayne. He’s one of our chatics. He’s been doing chatic for a year.”

New job. New profession. New title. Let’s see if it catches on. Probably not, but it’s worth a try.